Are you having a crush on someone who is in a relationship? Can we agree that as beautiful as love is, it can be a real inconvenience, especially when it’s one-sided? I mean, why aren’t we designed in a way that we only get attracted to available, single human beings? Instead, we are stuck with a mostly invalid format of attraction. We fall in love with anyone regardless of their availability.

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And we aren’t even talking about the ones who are single and don’t love us back. (That’s a whole other discussion.) No, we are talking about the cases where you fall in love with someone who’s already in a relationship.

“My crush is in a relationship,” is something people confide in their friends. The funniest part is a friend of mine did that when he was in college. But his crush broke up with her boyfriend. Now he is happily married to his crush with kids. So falling for someone who is in a relationship is not always tragic.

What if your crush has a boyfriend or girlfriend? You should try your best. If it works out fine, if it doesn’t just move on.

Related Reading: My Crush Is Dating My Bestie And This Is How I Am Surviving

What To Do When You Like Someone Who Is In A Relationship

There is that one friend who just lights up your days when you meet them, and you want to keep meeting them. You would love to hang out with them. Do the movies, fine dining and all the regular dating stuff. You’d ask them to meet you everyday, but there’s a catch.

They already have a partner. What do you go through when you fall in love with a girl, and she already has a boyfriend? It can be particularly annoying, this one.

It can be really difficult if your crush is dating someone else. You wish you could do all the things with them that they are doing it with someone else. All you get to do is hang out in the gang, get a “Hello hug” and a goodbye peck on the cheeks. You feel dejected and unhappy. But there are ways to cope if you have a crush on someone who is in a relationship. We tell you what to do.

Related reading: When I saw my live-in boyfriend having sex with someone else in our bed

1. Don’t judge yourself

To begin with, there’s the judgment that we have towards ourselves. How could you fall in love with someone who’s already committed?

In most cases, happily. Isn’t it perverse, immoral, wanting someone who’s already in another relationship? I can’t break up an on-going thing. I won’t be the home wrecker. I can’t be the other woman or man, assuming the object of my desire loves me back. This entire rollercoaster of emotions and conflicting feeling steers us towards guilt and make us doubt ourselves.

But stop doing that to yourself. You don’t always have a hold on your own feelings. And also remember if you talk to people you will realise that at some point in their lives they have had a crush on someone who is in a relationship. It’s perfectly normal. So don’t judge yourself and break your head over it.

2. Don’t keep saying, “Why God why?”

When Should I Give Up On My Crush?

This is a question that becomes the focal point of existence if you have a crush on someone who is in a relationship with someone else.

Should I just move away from my crush, you could be asking yourself. Yes, you should if there are issues in their life because of you. Also, if you see your crush is in love with their bae madly and there is no question of shifting their attention to you, you should move away.

Like Neil Nitin Mukesh diasppeared in the film New York from the life of his crush played by Katrina Kaif, who was in love with John Abraham, you should maintain a safe distance.

But if you really love the person and feel that you can be happy in their happiness then stay on. There is no denying the fact that some people have happy stories to tell. The happy endings are encouraging, but don’t hope for one always.

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There are stories of how best pals, wingmen, classmates who had a crush on someone already in a relationship did get their happy ending. But it doesn’t happen always.